How's your Résumé?
Every so often, or at one point in our lives, we’ve sought out a job opportunity. We’ve had hopes of securing a position of employment to better mold our future. Long ago, this task was accomplished by simply completing a 1-page job application, submitting it to the supervisor or store manager and waiting for a phone call.
Over time, and along with ongoing advancements of technology, the utilization of an résumé has become much more common, and effective. A 1-page job application just fails to ascertain all of the necessary information needed by a potential employer seeking to hire a candidate.
Previous employment, education and even credit scores are now factors to be considered when evaluating and selecting the best candidate for a position. And following a review of the résumé comes the dreaded interview, sealing the deal of whether or not you’re selected for the position.
But, have you ever asked yourself, in terms of securing a potential mate, how does your relationship résumé look?
Of course, when we hear the term ‘résumé’, we immediately think of job searches, employers, grammar, references, etc. However, while the term is loosely defined as a summary of professional and educational accomplishments and histories, as an adult, do we not also have a relationship résumé as well? (Rhetorical question, of course we do!)
We’ve often made mention of how men/women should have a warning label printed on the side of their bodies, warning us of their potential behavior(s). That being said, having a detailed document that outlines relationship accomplishments and histories would assist us a great deal. And just as with professional résumés, after reviewing the document, contacting the applicant and conducting the interview thereafter would follow, a.k.a. the ‘date’ (Get it now? Lol).
Well, it may be a good idea to take a moment to compile our own relationship résumés. Who knows, after completion, you may be surprised at how qualified/unqualified you may appear on paper. Unlike dating website profiles, this is a more detailed description entailing more than your eye color and favorite foods.
Below, we’ll take a step-by-step journey on how to complete our very own relationship résumé, section by section.
Now, a relationship résumé is similar to professional résumés. The material, however, will obviously be much different. The following sections should be included:
- Basic Information
- Relationship Experience
- Special Skills
Let’s review each section, briefly.
Every résumé should include your contact information atop of the document. This is common knowledge. Full name, current address, phone number and email address are all the basic details to be listed. Obviously, your potential mate (the reviewing official) should at least know your last name and phone number of course. Social media information is not relevant or recommended in this section. Let’s stick to the basics here.
What exactly are you seeking? A God-fearing woman? A meal ticket? A fling? A simple interaction you hope will evolve into something matrimonial? This section should be a brief synopsis of what your intentions are. Often times, our objectives aren’t matrimonial and can be promiscuous instead. If so, state such things. Bear in mind, the purpose of a résumé is for the reviewing official to determine if you are best suited for a position. The type of position, however, may vary (insert eye winking emoji here).
Unlike professional résumés, this section is an added feature. The only details needed here is to provide the reviewing official with a summary of who you are and where you came from. Where did you grow up? Did you have a decent childhood? Siblings? Religion? Relationship goals (if any)? This section simply describes you as a person, overall. No need to be lengthy here, its just part of the application process (for now).
Also differing from professional résumés, this section affords you the opportunity to not only disclose your parental status, but to also provide your perspective of parenthood. Do you have any children? If so, how many? Boy? Girl? Twins? How old? These are all details that in no way are factors against you but are factors to be considered. Let’s explore. Having children, for some, is a positive trait. While for others, not so much. The reviewing official may have children and prefer a mate whom also does. Reason being, there’s things that in their experience, they may believe only other parents can identify with. On the other hand, the reviewing official may prefer a mate without children, having aspirations of starting their own family in the future. Of course, for some, it makes no difference. Thus, this section should encompass your position on children. Do you want children? Are they are no-go? Etc.
This is a familiar section. This one should go unchanged compared to a professional résumé and should be just as consistent. Of course, there definitely shouldn’t be a requirement to show proof of a diploma or degree(s) here. In terms of relevance, while education may not define an individual, it is noted that the reviewing official would care to know that you have some intelligence. Intellectual discussions can be quite boring when they’re one sided.
This is another familiar section. While this may not be a deciding factor (in contrast to a professional résumé), the reviewing official may like to know 1.) you are employed and 2.) legally or illegally. No right or wrong listings here. If you work at McDonalds, ultimately, it IS a job. Compared to an unemployed individual, McDonalds is not frowned upon. If you are an erotic dancer, same methodology applies. A job is a job when it’s really broken down. Your goals, however, are another story (we’ll get to that later).
This section may be controversial, however, definitely has some relevance. The reviewing official may find it useful to know if you are financially responsible. Yes, you can list your assets, account balances, credit cards, etc. Do you have to? No. This section is simply to afford you the opportunity to disclose your financial situation (if any) to the reviewing official. Are you in debt? Are you financially secure? Are you in average standing? Repossessions? These are items best disclosed in the beginning rather than being exposed later. And while money may not be a deciding factor, your honesty most certainly will be. Whether you have twenty dollars in your account or twenty thousand, it’s only right to provide all the facts.
One’s goals are a subject commonly raised in nearly all dating situations. Reviewing officials often like to know not only where you are in life currently, but also where you want to be in the future. Ambitious? Tenacious? Impetuous? These are examples of traits often sought out in a mate. If financially, you aren’t where you want to be, is getting where you want to be on your to-do list? If you don’t have the position you desire in your place of employment, is acquiring it on your to-do list? If you have no children, is starting a family on your to-do list? (See how everything connects together?) Listing your strategies and tactics to accomplish your listed goals is a good idea as well.
Simple enough, this section should list any activities you engage in for leisure. Your reviewing official will want to know that you have a life outside of work and that you take time out to enjoy yourself. A workaholic, while likely accruing a massive bank account, can be a bore and routine at times. As commendable as it is to build a nest egg, enjoying life is equally as important. Remember, all information provided is being evaluated for the best suited mate so having mutual interests is good.
Probably the most important section of the entire résumé, this area should be descriptive, honest and include an accurate timeline/summary of events (chronologically). Throughout most relationships, couples aren’t as forthcoming about their past. While one should never focus too heavily on anyone’s past, potential mates could benefit from knowing your history. Of course, not judging one from their past is the ultimate practice, however, knowing your history, especially if it contains infidelity on your part, may be important information to be shared. As we know, not everyone is forthcoming and honest about his or her own instances of ‘cheating’ but like all things, honesty is key. While you may not be judged by your past mistakes, you most certainly can be judged by your current lies/omissions. Note, including time frames of the single life should also be added to this timeline.
It goes without saying that this section certainly isn’t part of a professional résumé. But, for obvious reasons, it’s certainly relevant to incorporate here. It’s quite important for the reviewing official to have an idea of your sexual position (no pun intended). Are you a dominant? A submissive? Soft sex? Rough? Are you a virgin? Into S & M? More importantly, what’s your ‘status’. These are all items to be shared. Again, while some people may have their deal breakers, there is no right or wrong answer applying here. However, it’s always a good idea to review this material because along with determining basic compatibility, at one point or another, sexual chemistry is evaluated as well.
In professional résumés, this area would usually list skills not aforementioned. In short, any particular set of skills you possess should be expounded upon here. As this is all an application process, it’s the best time to list why you believe you are different from any other applicant. Are you chivalrous? A good listener? Affectionate? Believe in reciprocity? Considerate? Thoughtful? Old-fashioned? These details should be listed, in detail, here. If you want to be set apart from the other applicants, this would be the ideal time to sell yourself.
Lastly, and similar to professional résumés in every way, are references. Caution: it may not be wise to list your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend as a reference. In a perfect world, ex-boyfriends/girlfriends would provide accurate, nonbiased information. However, reality may not always be so sincere. This area should be reserved for authentic, trusted individuals whom would be truthful if contacted and questioned about you. Obviously, anyone listed here would likely be viewed and suspected of fabricating the truth on your behalf, so it’s best to list people whom can vouch for your character and have good integrity. These people are pretty easy to identify in our lives. They’re likely the ones who know you better than you know yourself or who often ‘call you out on your bullshit’.
We often set our sights high on a qualified individual but rarely take the time to evaluate ourselves. Sure, we could fabricate our résumé (like most applicants do), but whether you incorporate all the details or not, we know the truth behind our own résumés, thoroughly. As bizarre as this all may sound, take the time, type it out and after reviewing it, ask yourself one simple question: would YOU date you?
Food for thought.